Harmful online comments on stories on women in business/sport etc

Online hostility towards women in visible positions, whether in business or sport, is unfortunately not new. I recently experienced this after commenting on the financial vulnerability of female footballers, where instead of constructive debate, some responses became personal, dismissive and focused on undermining the women themselves rather than the issue being discussed.

The damage is bigger than many realise. It does not just affect the individual receiving the comments, it creates a culture where women and girls see what happens when they speak up, succeed, or simply exist in public spaces.

People often post these comments because anonymity, bias, insecurity, or resistance to change make it easier to attack than to engage thoughtfully. The encouraging part is that these voices are often loud, but they are rarely representative of the wider public.

The real question is: would they write the same comment if the woman involved was their daughter, mother or sister?

People hide behind keyboards because they can. The screen gives them distance and a bit of false anonymity, and suddenly they're brave. Most of them wouldn't dream of saying half of it to your face in the Tesco queue, but online they're warriors with WiFi.
Yes, everyone is entitled to an opinion, that's healthy and how debate works. But there's a clear difference between disagreeing with someone and being cruel, and too many people sprint straight past that line without even noticing.
Honestly, it usually says more about them than the woman they're going after. Insecurity, jealousy, frustration with their own life, all of it gets dumped on someone visible and successful who had the nerve to take up a bit of space.
Opinions are fine. Pile-ons aren't. The second your comment is designed to wound rather than discuss, you've stopped being a critic and started being a bully. The keyboard doesn't change that.

The damage isn't always where people think it is. It’s in the harder, quieter damage to those watching.

Women thinking about putting their heads above the parapet, starting a business, running for office, or speaking up in their industry are taking notes. They see what happens to the women who go first, and calculate the cost.

That's the chilling effect that doesn't show up in any dataset, but it shows up in boardrooms, podcasts and ballots that, to the outside observer, never happen.

There's a concept in positive psychology called "broaden and build". Positive emotions broaden our thinking and help us build resources, relationships, and resilience over time. The reverse is also true. Sustained hostility narrows us. It shrinks ambition, contracts networks, and makes people self-edit before they've even spoken.

When a high-profile woman is publicly trashed, the real cost isn't borne by her, it's borne by the fifteen-year-old watching. That's what we should be angry about.