Exam results 2022

"Whether grades are as expected, better, or worse than predicted, come results day, emotions are likely to be running high for young people and parents alike. Interestingly, over the past 2 results years we saw quite a lot of exam disappointment even when grades were high. This was because students believed it felt like it was cheating or somehow wasn't their real grades because they'd never got a chance to sit their exams. 2022 is the first year for a while where exams have been completed. However, the students sitting those exams have absolutely not had the same experiences as their predecessors in the summer of 2019! If when the results are in you are feeling super proud and excited about results it is so important to celebrate this. Notice where in your body you feel this pride and take some breaths as you help your body and mind to recognise and connect with these feelings. Doing this will allow you to draw upon these moments more mindfully when you encounter tough days in future. Whatever the results and the feelings which arise from them it's okay to lean into the emotions: feel the joy and also recognise any pain or distress. When setbacks happen it can be easy to feel like re-sitting a year is the end of the world. Shame and embarrassment are big, complex feelings and can feel overwhelming. It can feel like people will never stop talking about it and that the set backs might last a lifetime. However, it is important to help anyone feeling this way to appreciate that today's news will soon fade to grey and that in the grand scheme of things one year doesn't make a difference to outcomes. It certainly doesn't make a difference to the love and pride a parent, family and friends feel as that is not related to outcomes. Whatever the results, well done to you for getting through these last few years of a pretty rocky educational journey. Great things are coming and they're just around the corner for you!"

The best piece of advice I could possibly give is not to panic. If you don't get the grades you were hoping for, there will still be plenty of options available to you. We're all on different journeys and it doesn't matter if you end up taking a bit of a detour to get to your ultimate destination. It's also important parents don't invalidate or undermine their children's feelings. Even if Jeremy Clarkson tweets his annual, "I didn't get the grades and look at me now" catchphrase, your child will need support, guidance, patience and understanding. Let them feel their feelings and make sense of what's happening in their own terms. They will need to recalibrate and find a new way forward, and this takes time. There's no rush to come up with a new plan for the next three years of their life overnight.

Coping strategies: It is normal and natural to feel disappointed if you don't get the results you are looking for. Give yourself time to process and deal with what you are feeling. Talk to a loved one you trust about how you are feeling. It will help you get some perspective on the situation. When things are in our mind and our mind only, they can feel a lot worse than they are. Once you feel ready, consider your future options. It will help you feel a bit more in control of the situation rather than feeling helpless and out of control. Also, stay mindful and focus on the things you can control. This will avoid any catastrophising and any downward spirals of negative thoughts. Importantly, don't compare yourself to others, this will only lead to despair and further disappointment. Focus on your efforts, hard work, and remind yourself that you did the best you could. Finally, remember that in this day and age there are so many opportunities available to learn, work, and get jobs. You are not limited to just one option, so remind yourself of this to avoid losing hope and motivation. Signs for Parents that their child isn't taking the results well: Disappointment can sometimes show up as anger, anxiety, irritation or frustration, so watch out for these emotions. Also watch for a change in your child's behaviour. For example, are they withdrawn, disengaged or detached, or they are not actively listening when you are having a conversation with them? It is also not uncommon for children to start displaying rebellious behaviours that are out of character for them. Also, new physical symptoms can manifest as a result of stress or anxiety from exam results e.g. headaches; back or shoulder pain; tummy pains; aches and pains in body; changes in appetite; feeling sick or nauseous. Should parents pre-warn or wait until results get in? Parents shouldn't pre-warn their children at all about grades likely being tougher to achieve this year because that in itself might create unnecessary stress or anxiety. However, what parents should do is reassure their child that, regardless of the results, they love them; that they are proud of their child for being able to study and sit exams despite all the chaos and disruption in the last couple of years due to pandemic; and remind and reassure their child that they will be there to support and help them no matter what the results are. Advice for parents and pupils when dealing with (exam-related) stress: 1. Stop, breathe, and focus on relaxing your body. When your body is relaxed, this helps the mind to slow down instead of overthinking; overanalysing; or feeling overwhelmed. 2. Exercise - this will help to get rid of stress hormones and adrenaline from the body, allowing you to feeling calmer and at ease. 3. When stressed, the mind focuses on all the things you can't control. This further increases stress and anxiety. Instead, make a list of all the things you can control in that moment. This will instantly help you to put things into perspective. 4. Talk to a loved one about how you are feeling. Saying things out loud will help you to release negative feelings instead of keeping them bottled up inside you.